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failure is an event-not who you are.

jonathan rios

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July 8, 2020

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  Are people allowed to DISAGREE with you? They should be. We have names for people who have to be “right” all the time. STUBBORN. CONTROLLING. TYRANNICAL. NARCISSISTIC. If you FEEL personally assaulted when someone refutes or disagrees with your view then that is a sign you have tethered your identity to your view. By […]

May 22, 2020

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October 22, 2019

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In psychology FORTUNE telling refers to the tendency to make conclusions and predictions based on little to no evidence and holding them as truth. This is a MAJOR player in anxiety & mood disorders. Examples: A single female predicts that she will never find love based only on the fact that she has not found […]

October 22, 2019

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Here’s another thinking pattern that’ll eat you alive, provoke anxiety, and keep you in your own judgmental hell. “ALL OR NOTHING” thinking. Black or white thinking. This thinking distortion manifests itself as an inability or unwillingness to see “the middle ground”. In other words you see things in EXTREMES. Something is either fantastic or awful. […]

July 15, 2019

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Take this to the bank. You will likely experience “anxiety” anytime you take a new path. When you transition from familiar to “unfamiliar ”. Why? Because your nervous system (especially your amygdala) is designed to keep you alive and locate anything that SEEMS “unfamiliar” or “threatening” (which is virtually everything) when you are on a […]

July 15, 2019

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Some horses are too wild to hang with the herd. They bite and buck and cause injuries to the others. What do you do with a dangerous animal? You separate it until it can learn new behavior. You train it. But it has to be teachable.  We do the same with humans. If you don’t […]

July 15, 2019

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Most of us want relief, we don’t want the actual cure. Cures can be painful. They can be intense. They will require something of you.  For years I had severe lower back pain. I tried ice, Advil, alcohol, stretching, heating pads, prayer. Nothing worked. And then I took the hard road of strengthening my core. […]

May 8, 2019

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You have to be a fool before you can become a master. You have to be willing to look like an idiot. No matter what your career path or goal is. The secret to mastery is to embrace the day of foolish beginnings. Its a season for making errors. But most of us won’t go […]

May 8, 2019

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Ok- so you’ve got a few “goals” you’d like to hit. Everyone does. We’re all longing for something. Here’s the best way to start making REAL progress. 2 simple steps……. Identify your “Outcome goal” first. Here’s an example: “I want to score more free throws during basketball games”   Next you identify (2-3) process goals. […]

May 8, 2019

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So many of the young men I see are bored and directionless. Many of them have been given so much that they never had to fight for anything and thus never experienced the glory of a hard fought victory. Necessity can be a cruel but enlightening teacher. When I married at 29 I had a […]

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